Spenc
by Waterwolfwritter
Summary: They fell in love. They fell apart and fell to pieces. Reid x OC
1. Chapter 1

Hey this one is from 1st person. I promise some 3rd person and changing pov. The name is what I originally saved the story under in my computer. If you have a better name let me know.

XxXxX

He can not love. He can not love. He can not love. No matter how many times I say that, I can not even believe it. He loved me and I loved him.

Why? Of all the people in the world why him? I mean come on. I could have fallen for anyone else. Anyone in the world. A billion or so people in the world, and I meet him. Why?

Ok, I avoided anything like love. He avoid it also. One of us fell and dragged the other with them. I guess we had a revenge plot in mind. You make me fall in love, I make you fall in love also. At lest we did not drag anyone into this.

Well he did bring his friends into this. I mean we spent a lot of time with them. I was just fine with no one knowing about us. I mean I was not ashamed, just a little confused. I had never been here before. I had never loved anyone the way I loved him.

I loved him and it was scary sometimes. I mean the way I needed him. The way I would freak out if he was gone on a case, and I did not hear from him for a long time. He had told me about the time he had been kidnapped. That time he had died and been brought back to life. What could happen to him in a few hours on the job scared me. Especially since it had happened to him before.

Once again, HE COULD NOT LOVE. HE DID NOT LOVE ME. I DID NOT LOVE HIM. No matter how many times I say that, I can not believe that we did not have love.

We had been in love. That is why there is so much pain. I wake up and I think about how it ended. Why had we both let go? I still loved him then. I still love him now. I guess I am still a little confused. I mean I hate him for how much I love him some days. Other days I love him so much I am in pain. Still there are days I am happy we let go because it was for the best. At lest on those days, I think it was for the best.

Maybe bi-polar would be a better word for what I am now. I make it to work. I make it home. I look at a cell phone with his number in it. It has my friends' numbers and his friends' numbers. I could call one of them. I could have one of his friends tell me how he is doing, and if he misses me. I could call my friends and ask them if they want to hang out. I decide every day to just go to bed and not use that cellphone. I only have one number I want to call and I will not call him.

I was a normal person before that day in the coffee shop. I was completely normal. I mean you looked up the dictionary definition of normal, and saw a picture of me. I have a normal regular job were I do not travel. I have good befits and a good boss. I have friends. My friends and I use to hang out every weekend. I had a perfectly normal life. Then he happened to me, and my life went far from normal.

He has a really weird job. He travels every week. He was the definition of weird. He is a genius. He is the youngest FBI profiler ever. I mean how much more weird could you get? Well I guess he is still the definition of weird. He was not as changed as I was. He gave me something so great, and he took away my normal. While he gave me his love, I was fine not being normal. Now his love and my normal are both gone.

What do I have to show for giving up my normal? A bunch of heart ache. I do not even have a photograph of us. We took a few but all of them were on his friends cameras. They promised to send copies. Before they sent the promised copies, we ended. It took them forever to get those pictures to me. So long that I never got them.

I guess I still have my shell of normal. I still have the normal friends. I still have the normal job. My life is still normal. Yet now I know I am alone. It feels hollow when someone you love leaves you. I had love and love that could last but it just disappeared.

Why did he leave me alone and empty? I am a great person. I go the extra mile. I work as hard as possible. I tried to make it work. He is just so mean and horrible. He has not heart. He can not feel. He is just so... completely wonderful. I guess I love everything I hate about him.

Love does not exist. No I will not believe that. I refuse to let him take this also. I can not and will not lose my faith in love. That faith in love keeps me going. Maybe there is new love around the corner.

I did not love him. I did not love him. I DID NOT LOVE HIM! There is only one problem with that lie. I know I did love him. I also know that I love him. So I did not love him is slightly true. I still love him so it is more present tense than past tense. I guess that lie might stick. Yeah I would believe that lie if the moon was made of cheese.

I guess I should drag myself into bed. I guess tomorrow I can figure a lie out tomorrow. If not tomorrow, the day after tomorrow. I guess some day I will figure out a lie and move past him. I am not sure when but I hope soon. Well I am not really sure of anything any more.

"Hey Baby, It is the love of your life. If you can hear this, please pick up. I am on the other end wanting to talk to you. I.." Says his all too familiar voice.

I pick up the phone and answer it. I curse myself for not changing his ring tone. We had made matching ring tones to go with our phones. We thought it was cute. Now it is pain and torture to hear his ring tone with his voice. I was glad I could get to the phone when I did. I could not survive hearing those three little words that lit up my world but now tear it down.

"Hey" He breathes over the phone.

"Hey" I say back.

"Reeve, I need to see you as soon as possible. I need to talk to you." he says back with desperation.

He had never told me he had ever needed anything. He never told me he needed me or to that he needed to see me. For that reason alone I answer with "How about in 2 hours at our usual spot?"

The other line goes silent. "Spencer?" I ask wondering if he is still there.

"Sure." He says and hangs up.

I get ready. I drive to our location. I arrive a little early and see that he arrived early also. "Hey" we breathe together.

XxXxX

So that's all folks, until next time. I also have the entire story plot in my mind. It just has to make it to my computer.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey folks, welcome back. I am glad you like it. Or maybe you just want to know more. Maybe you just can not stop reading. Or you could just be really bored and desperate. Well, no matter what brings you here, I hope you enjoy it. Oh and this one is 3rd person. The main focus point here is Reid.

XxXxXxX

Reid stared at the file. The more he stared the less he saw what lay before him. He was drifting in and out of thought again. He was thinking about her. The way she said his name. The way she smiled. The way she was. He could not seem to get past this one, the girl not the file. This girl was unlike the other two.

He knew only have been in love with 3 girls, and for a guy his age was statistically way below normal. He was not interested in having any form of relationships outside of his team. He was more quite and shy than anything else. He never talked to people he did not know, unless of course someone he knew introduced him or if they had something to do with a case. It was so rare that he shocked himself when he first talked to her.

_It was just a simple coffee shop. When they finished with a coffee, they just called out what it was. They never put names on the cups. That is why two hands reached for the same coffee. She was the girl in front of him in line. She was the girl who enjoyed the same coffee as he did. She was someone he had to know. She was someone..._

"Reid." said Hotch

Reid looked up at his boss, and realized he had tuned out the world around him. He did that more often after they had broken up. He would think of her and not the serial killer. He would remember her details instead of spitting out quotes. He knew that his focus should be work but it was her.

"It looks like this unsub has a thing with fingers." said Reid after he quickly glanced down at the sheet.

"I guess you were paying attention." muttered Hotch

In that moment, Reid was thankful he could read 2,000 wpm. He was saved from being yelled at by Hotch but decided it would be best to try to focus on the meeting. He might not miss the same bullet twice."After he takes the fingers, he kills them. I do not know what kind of sicko removes fingers while people are alive." said Garcia

"Look Baby Girl we will get the monster." said Morgan

"No one can hide from you my chocolate delight." said Garcia

"Wheels up in thirty." Hotch announced.

XxXxXx

He was lost in thought on the plane when Hotch walked up to him. "Reid, what is going on with you?" asked Hotch

Reid could see the concern Hotch's face. What would Reid say to his boss? What could he say to his boss? He could not just say he had lost the woman he loved. Hotch had to bury the woman he loved, who was also the mother of his child. He could not just say he was reliving the best time of his life. Even though that was true, it would hurt his entire team for him to say that. He could not tell him that his life was slipping out of focus just like she had slipped out of his life.

"Hotch, I am fine." said Reid

"Reid, I need the truth. Are you using again?"asked Hotch

"NO! I would never use again. Why would I ever use again?" said Reid offended

"We all know how much you cared about Reeve. I know you thought about using again when you thought Emily was dead. Reid, I know you remember when I lost Haley the first time. The fact I tried to hide my feelings did not help the team." said Hotch

Reid remembered everything, so he remembered how Hotch acted after Haley divorced him. He remembered how Hotch tried to hide how he felt and failed. He knew that it was useless to try and hide his feelings. "Hotch I lost someone I deeply care about. The worst part is she is still alive. I could call her and talk to her. I know she can move on. I know she can get over me. I know she could heal. I could call her and have her tell me she is doing fine. Yet I can not move on. She was the last woman I am ever going to love. I let her slip through my fingers." said Reid

"How do you know if she has moved on, if you do not called her?" said Hotch

"I am sure she has moved past me. I know calling her would do nothing." said Reid

"For a smart kid, you act pretty dumb." said Emily who was ears dropping like everyone else on the plane.

"She wants to hear from you Spence." said JJ

Before Reid knew it, everyone on the plane was telling him to call her. Wave after wave they tried to get him to call her. It was like the wanted nothing more than for him to suffer a little more. He knew she was happy without him. How could they not believe him? He was sure of one thing. She was past him.

"I know she has moved on, I will not be calling her. It is over." said Reid as he went to the back of the plane.

XxXxXx

They landed an hour after the confrontation with Reid. Reid was still upset with the entire team for telling him to call her. He was a genius, and he had thought about doing that. Reid knew there was no way calling her would help. "Reid do you know how far away the police station is?" asked JJ as she tried to make up for what happened on the plane.

"27.9872 miles. In traffic, the time it takes us to get there should be about 49 minutes and 55 seconds." said Reid.

"Why can you not just say an hour like a normal person?" asked Morgan

"An hour is not the correct amount of time. 49 minutes and 55 seconds is the exact amount of time." said Reid

"Ok boy genius we are going to prove this. I am going to start a stop watch. If you are right you can continue to say the exact time. If you are wrong, you are going to have start saying an hour." said Morgan

"You are on." said Reid

They drove and got the police station at exactly 49 minutes and 56 seconds. "Boy genius, you are off." said Morgan

"By how much?" said Reid

"By 1 second. I guess you have to start saying an hour now." said Morgan

"I was not off." said Reid

"What gives you that idea?" asked Morgan

"I was off by a second, and that is an acceptable percentage of error." said Reid

"So you are going to continue to use the exact time even though you were wrong and agreed to quit doing that?" said Morgan

"I am going to continue to use the exact time because I was right and plus the way you acted on the plane buys me a little bit of leverage." said Reid.

The team thought it had blown over but they all knew Reid would never forget. Reid would never forget but he would forgive. Plus as long as they cared, that was all that mattered.

XxXxXx

They figured out who the murderer was in a few days latter. He was an abused child. His father would break his fingers when he did not match his father's expectations. With his father being a loan shark, it was not often that he met his father's expectations. His father was not arrested until he was 16. The abuse caused him to take fingers off the victims he killed.

Reid was the closet because he was the only at the station. So he left with a few cops to get the unsub. Reid was elected to go first. He knocked on the door and announced police. There was no answer. Anther officer knocked down the door, and Reid went in. The cops outside herd a few shots and the Reid was screaming for a paramedic.

Reid had walked into the apartment. The unsub shot at him and the bullet grazed the top of his head. Reid shot at him in return. He missed the leg of the unsub but hit the unsub's arm, that was holding the gun. That caused the unsub to drop the gun. When it hit the ground, it fired again. Reid cuffed the unsub and called for the paramedic.

He then began to search the apartment. In the bedroom he found a girl. He called for the paramedics again. She was missing a finger. "Do you know what he did with your finger?" Reid asked the girl

"I have no idea." she said before she broke down crying.

Reid untied her. In return, she cried and bleed all over him. He, in turn, got lost in thought. Which brought him back to the moment the unsub just barely missed him. That moment made him realize one thing. He could die on the job anytime. He could lose his life trying to save another life. He also realized that he had one regret in his entire life. He could not die without making this one regret right.

Once the paramedics got to the girl, Reid lead the search for her finger. They found it. They also found about a 6 additional fingers belonging to unknown victims. Reid surveyed the scene and decided that it was a lose/win scenario. They found the unsub and saved the girl. On the down side 6 new families that only had a missing person who had hope that they could come back alive, would now be waiting for police to find a well hidden body.

XxXxXx

He reached for his cellphone. It had been four hours since the plane landed. He listened to his favorite ring tone. "Hey Baby, It is the love of your life. If you can hear this, please pick up. I am on the other end wanting to talk to you. I love you." said her voice.

That I love you gave him strength to call Reeve. He waited for what felt like a life time for her to answer."Hey" he said when she answered.

"Hey" she said back making him wonder if she really had moved on.

"Reeve, I need to see you as soon as possible. I need to talk to you." he begged her, hoping against all odds she had not moved on.

"How about in 2 hours at our usual spot?" she replied

He was shocked. She was willing to talk to him in 2 hours. He sat there in silence unsure if this was real.

"Spencer?"she said.

At the sound of her voice, he snapped out of it."Sure." He said as he hung up.

He got ready and got there a little bit early, knowing she would be early also. At the same time they breathed "Hey" as if that was all they could mange.

XxXxXxX

Yeah this chapter took more time to edit than to write. I know it is not perfect but no one is. I am also sorry this is the first story to get updated.


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